My Son is a Thief

My four year old had been home from school for a couple of hours. We did the usual check in about school, snack time and then he watched some TV. I was cooking dinner while talking to his father when I see this head pop around the corner. Chase, my four year old, had a mischievous look on his face. I looked down to see he had a little toy in his hand. At first glance I thought it was one of his several little Lego guys. Something caused me to look a little closer. I think it had to be the look he had on his face, I just knew something was not right. I asked Chase what he had and he replied with : "A little guy". There he was, little drummer boy.

Because I am Mama, I know every toy my son has. If you are a Mama too you know what I mean. I am always cleaning out, weeding out, and organizing the heap of toys in my sons room. I like to keep this as organized as possible and will occasionally go through his toy box to throw away sort through (shhhh, don't tell him I throw things away!) things which I consider junk. Therefore I am familiar with most of his toys and know almost all their names. This little drummer boy and I had not met. No, Mama never forgets a face!

I asked Chase where he got this "little guy" to which he responded: "In my toy box". I knew Chase was lying and I was trying to give him the opportunity to tell me on his own that he had taken the toy from school. I asked another time and his reply was the same. Hey, I guess if you are going to lie at least keep sticking with the same story right?! Chase had this shit grin on his face though that he couldn't seem to hide away. I directly asked him if he had taken the toy from school. One more time, my son the thief, lied to me and told me that he had found him in his toy box.

At this point I asked Chase to hand to hand over the toy and told him to go to his room for a moment. I needed to take a second to think about what I wanted to say to him rather than react to the fact that he took something from school, then lied to me about it. To be honest I even shared a laugh with his father about it before calling him back to the kitchen. One thing though that I try my best to instill in my son is that in this house, we don't lie. In this house, we are honest. I think I was more upset that he lied to me than the fact that he took the toy. The fact that he took the toy, well that was an entire different set of feelings I was dealing with too.

Chase was asked to come back in the kitchen where we had "the talk" about  how we don't steal and we don't lie about stealing. I asked him how he would feel if someone took his toys and didn't give them back. I then placed the toy on a shelf where he could see it and let him know that he would be the one to return it to his teacher when he goes back to school.

He is Four, I do know this is age appropriate and that this may not be the last time this happens. I have to admit though that something happened inside me. I felt disappointment that he did this. He had never taken anything before. I felt responsible for his actions and even a slightly embarrassed about it.

This has nothing to do with me! No, Chase was just being a kid. He is testing limits, pushing boundaries, and challenging me. That is exactly what he should be doing. He is learning, exploring, and discovering what he can and cannot do. It is my job to help teach him. This wasn't just a lesson in learning for Chase; this became a new lesson for Mama.

This morning as I am sipping my coffee, hearing the laughter from Chase's room, I smile to myself about it. I think it is time for me to pour another cup and continue looking for that parenting handbook...I know it has to be around here somewhere...


Happy Friday Friends!! Have a fabulous weekend!