Tuesday, July 28, 2015

What I Want My Children To Know About Love

I am in recovery from a most epic weekend. For those of you who know me or have been following me, you know that after five and a half years my partner and I finally took the plunge. Yes, it is official : I am a "Mrs" now!

We have done most everything in our relationship backwards; I have never been one to follow the rules. I do not regret any part of it. It is our own "Fairy Tale" made up of love, laughter, and two boys who we are wildly in love with.

It was special having the boys be a part of our day. They were dressed up in little suits equipped with ties and dress shoes that my four year old still insists on wearing with his shorts. Our little guy had no idea what was going on yet we have talked with Chase about this wedding since we started planning it five months ago. He still doesn't fully understand what marriage is yet I hope he will remember the day as he gets older. I want him to have flashes of us standing there, face to face, vowing to spend the rest of our lives together. With that being said this is what I want my children to know about love:

Love who you want: Do not let race, gender, or what anyone else says deter you from true love.

There is no perfect way to love, though love can be perfect for two people: We spend our lives trying to perfect relationships when all we need to do is love with our heart and souls. It won't always be easy, there will be times that it will be down right hard and ugly. In those times you need to love more. Give more. Every relationship is different and no one's love is greater than another.

You must have laughter in a home: Love is about happiness and bringing out joy in one another. If you can laugh together then you have found the antidote to any sadness that may weather in your home.

It's not a job, but it is work: In order for any relationship to thrive you need to work on it all the time. Love requires the commitment to allow it to grow and change. Love will be challenged, love may even hurt. Love will also heal.

Support one another: Know what the other is passionate about and support that passion even if it is not yours! Listen, be present, and encourage your partner to do what he or she wants.

Forgive: There will be fights, screaming, and sometimes crying. Never hold onto an argument. It is not about who is right and who is wrong. It is called compromise. Find that place in the middle where you both can feel that your feelings have been acknowledged.

Live in the moment: Never take the other one for granted. Life is a gift, often times taken away too quickly. Live each day as your last. Each day smile, laugh, and kiss one another. Go to bed every night with the last words being "I Love You."

Be thankful: Your love to one another is a gift. It is sacred. Create moments of gratitude with your partner. Let them know you appreciate them, that you appreciate the love you have made.

It has only been five years yet I hope that my children see the love we have for one another and grow knowing it. In thirty, forty, fifty years from now I want my children to look at us and never doubt the love we have for one another. These things are what I want my children to know about love.


  1. Awesome post and congratulations! Pun intended - love it!

  2. This is beautiful. I think the art of being in love has been lost. I really hope my children get the chance to fall in love without it being all texts and emails. I think that letting them know it's work is SO important too. I feel like getting a divorce is so expected now, that once it gets hard its just like, okay, let's get a divorce, and that is so sad.

    1. Happy that you like it Morgan. I love how you say that the "art of being in love is lost". I absolutely agree which is why I want to be an example of a strong and healthy love for my children. It's not always easy, not always happy, but love is worth it when it is real. I hope my children can find that someday just as we did.

  3. Wonderful post!

    Congratulations on your wedding & wishing you lots of love & happy years!

    1. Thank you so much! Looking forward to many happy years!! He's a keeper!

  4. Congratulations, Crystal! I wish you all the happiness in the world :)