Chase was 10 1/2 weeks when he first went to daycare. Not even three months old. It was one of the most difficult things I have ever done, leaving my child with another person to care for him. I cried for weeks after I would leave him. My rides to work seemed so long and my heart felt as though it shattered. Dramatic a bit? No, this is truly how I felt. For me I had always envisioned staying home with my children. My mom stayed home with us until I was a freshman in high school. I wanted the same for my own family. Here I was, dropping off my first son off to daycare. I was fortunate to have chosen a daycare provider that was wonderful and and he was surely in the best hands. But he is my son, and I felt it was my job to be there with him. I adjusted though and got back into work. I loved what I did and that helped make the days go by faster.
|Chase ~ 3 Months|
When we decided to have another baby we sat down and discussed work vs me staying home. I knew this time around I needed to be home. I didn't want to miss any more moments. I wanted to be there to watch my children and care for them. Financially it didn't make sense to put two children in daycare. I couldn't grasp that most of what I would be making would go to someone else watching my children every day, no matter how wonderful they were. So after working since I was 16, and having been in the field I was in for almost 14 years, I started a new job. I became a SAHM.
Now let me tell you, I have girlfriends who are SAHM's that have always said it is the hardest job you will ever have. Yes, they are telling the truth! It becomes a different kind of balance. Believe it or not you still struggle to find time to clean, cook, and take a shower! Some days a shower is a luxury. Taking a shower alone, that's a whole other kind of paradise. Alone time, never! As many times as one may try to even sneak on line for a Facebook peak or check email there is a child who needs something. (BTW, it can take more than one time sitting down to write a blog entry). I also have two children who have completely different needs. I also struggle to feel like some days I don't do enough. Other days I feel accomplished.
It is rewarding for me to stay home. I am happy in this job. Hard, absolutely! Some days are down right exhausting. As a family we sacrifice to have me stay home. It's not that we are "lucky we can". I don't like hearing that because for us it is that we are lucky because we have made it happen. My bank account is empty these days. I don't ever buy anything for myself. I choose this though, it is my job. My pay is priceless. I get to see my children every day. I get it all, the good and the bad. This also won't last forever. I will go back to work full time someday. I will not regret this time. These are the days I will never get back.
I know how hard both jobs are. There is no comparison. Not one is more difficult than the other. Every woman does what it best for her family and her. I respect that. I have walked in both shoes. Each one has it's list of pro's & con's. Each one challenges you and makes you a stronger, incredible, and amazing MOM!!
|Someone thinks he is pretty cool|
|This is Wes just awake from a nap|